Aerial Issues

Is it normal to have a crush on someone's biceps but also hate them because they're stronger than you? It's called a hate crush. I'm sure a lot of aerialists have them.

Is It Me?

She's so grown up now, she's way more fun than she was back then. She has a gang of guys who follow her around trying to fuck her, if only you could hang out! I just don't get it. Is there something wrong with me? Because you just can't seem to stay away from her, and your conversations always seem of ride the border of inappropriate. And you always leave it right. in. my. face.

Modern Girls

I feel like bringing a girl a pretty bouquet of flowers is becoming an obsolete gesture these days. That sucks. I love flowers.

Making the transition from worried to pissed. Again.

I hate it, and it makes me sick.

In Case Of Optimisim

Remember, there's always a new low to hit, and always a despicable new part of your psyche to discover.

Car Accidents Happen All The Time.

Having an all consuming hate for someone you barely know is sometimes crippling, and a very good way to ruin a day. I don't feel guilty for hoping that someone gets hit by a bus.